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Category Archives: Department of Applause

What a Surprise: Hunters Don’t Like Being Shot At

After gunning down a few ducks last month in Wisconsin, a couple of gutless savages had the audacity to complain about a few shotgun blasts being fired in their direction. According to the Duluth, Minn.-based ABC affiliate WDIO, “within minutes of shooting two mallards, the hunters became the hunted.” Van Hawkinson, who fired the protest […]

Pious Drunk in Alaska Endangers Bear’s Life

On its face, a news report out of Alaska about a man’s tussle with a black bear seems to have a happy ending, inasmuch as both survived the encounter. The truth of the matter is that the bear is alive, fortunately, in large part because the human in question made it painfully (if you’ll pardon […]

Vegan Fashion House Vaute Couture Shows There is “No Excuse Left to Wear Animals”

VAUTE- New York Fashion Week Solo Debut from Leanne Mai-ly Hilgart on Vimeo. In a January 31 blog post, Vaute Couture owner and designer Leanne Mai-ly Hilgart announced that she’d be presenting her “first solo show at New York Fashion Week, as the first all vegan label to show at” the high-profile event. Following her […]

Nellie McKay on Animal Rights and Activism

I’m listening, as I write this, to Frank Zappa’s Broadway the Hard Way, a live recording made during a 1988 concert tour that remains as powerful a musical uppercut as has ever been delivered to the Republican Party’s drooling maw in the run-up to a presidential election. I’ve been thinking quite a bit lately about social […]

Monday Maul: Gorillas Outsmart Hunters, Destroy Traps

“… They worked on the patient, sifting handfuls of fine Triassic sand into the crankcase, cutting up the wiring, the fuel lines, the hydraulic hoses to fore and aft attachments, dumping Karo into the fuel tanks. …” — Edward Abbey, The Monkey Wrench Gang Just last night, a friend returned my copy of Edward Abbey’s […]

Performance Artist Frames Animal-Testing Protest

Police and officials from the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals shut down a Regent Street cosmetics shop today minutes after a laboratory technician began conducting horrific and painful product testing on a terrified beagle in full view of shoppers and passersby. … That didn’t happen. After all, no fully evolved human […]

Monday Maul: “True Blood” Star Kristin Bauer Joins Anti-Poaching Effort

“Despite the sincere well-wishes I have exchanged with friends, family, and acquaintances in these early days of the New Year, I remain unable — and unwilling — to shake an enduring melancholy. As long as soulless humans find spiritual or material reward in the exploitation, torture, and murder of other species, I’ll gladly forfeit any […]

Monday Maul: Animal Abuse and Cruelty at a North Carolina Butterball Facility

When Reuters reported earlier this month that “sewing needles were found in food on four U.S.-bound flights … from Amsterdam,” I was reminded of the good fortune I had back in mid-February to watch a meat-industry lobbyist choke to death at 30,000 feet. My friend Jim (not necessarily his real name) and I witnessed the […]

Pork Industry Wants to Keep Pigs in Gestation Crates

I was reading Marcus Aurelius Armitage’s latest essay, Human Hearts are There to be Eaten: Feeding the World Through Organ Donation, when the red phone rang. “It’s all fun and games till a pig chews through your rib cage!” It was my friend Monty Gelstein calling from what sounded like the inside of a garbage […]

Would-Be Rabbit Killer Accidentally Shoots Himself

I’m pleased to report that Death paid an obviously long-overdue visit last month to Marko Tomović, a 21-year-old Serbian savage who was trying desperately to satisfy his bloodlust when Karma called. From “The police said that Tomović ‘saw a rabbit, that was not moving, by the side of the road.’ This prompted him to […]