The good news is that a coyote attacked a turkey hunter in Maine and got away with it. The bad news is that the hunter survived.
“The wild canine sprang while the Maine Guide was hunkered down in the brush, using a mouth-call to lure a turkey into the open while hunting on private property near the Washington County community of Cooper,” the Bangor Daily News reported on May 1.
“I’ll never forget looking up and seeing a jaw full of teeth coming at me. … He was determined to have turkey for breakfast and was also determined that the sound he heard was a hen turkey,” the hunter, Bill Robinson, told the Bangor Daily News, which reported that “once the coyote realized it had jumped a human, not a hen, it sprinted away.”
Mr. Robinson told the Bangor Daily News that the coyote “ran 100 miles an hour across that field” and that the animal “was as shocked and surprised to see me, as I was to see it. I took a shot at it, but it was too far off by then. I turned it around for a second when I hit him in the haunch with a few pellets from my turkey load, just to say goodbye. … But I don’t blame the coyote. It was doing what coyotes do, hunting. My guess is that coyote was perfectly healthy and was not rabid. He was big, probably 50 pounds. I’m just glad it didn’t grab my neck.”
I, on the other hand, am disappointed that the coyote didn’t manage to sink his teeth into Mr. Robinson’s throat.
Telling us, by way of the Bangor Daily News, that he doesn’t “blame the coyote,” that the animal “was doing what coyotes do, hunting,” is a lame attempt by Mr. Robinson to call things relatively even — that because both he and the coyote were turkey hunting, and no serious harm was done, no foul needs to be assessed.
Sure, doctors put Mr. Robinson on “a two-week regimen of precautionary rabies vaccine injections,” as the Bangor Daily News reported, but that treatment was administered just to be on the safe side.
Mr. Robinson wants us to know that he harbors no ill will toward the coyote — just as he harbored no ill will toward the turkey whose head he’d hoped to blow off. It’s not personal, in other words. Mr. Robinson was doing what hunters do — seeking spiritual reward through the killing of wildlife.
In a discussion forum on Paco Kelly’s Leverguns.com, an individual posting under the screen name “TedH” wrote (poorly): “I bet Bill will be doing some some coyote hunting in the future?”
“Marlin32” wrote (also poorly): “Coyotes … have cost me a few toms, and some of them paid for it with their lives. A 2 1/2oz dose of #5 lead at under 20 feet will sure do a coyote in. Almost turned him inside out.”
And “MrMurphy” wrote: “And people wonder why we hunt coyotes around here.”
The Bangor Daily News reported that Mr. Robinson “lives in Edmunds Township” and has been “a Maine Guide for eight years.” The Maine Professional Guides Association website lists a Bill R. Robinson of Edmunds Township as being affiliated with Dennys River Guide Service, which helps hunters kill a variety of wildlife.
Want to kill a black bear? According to its website, which identifies Bill Robinson as its owner, “Guided Bear hunts with the Dennys River Guide Service are all done over bait from tree stands. Washington County is known for its high concentration of black bear and the success rate is high over bait. All bait sites are maintained daily by Bill, with each site chosen carefully in regard to wind and location. Clients are only put in tree stands at bear baits that are being hit on a frequent basis. Transportation and tree stands provided.”
Murder-scene photos on the Dennys River Guide Service website show bloodthirsty sadists posing pridefully with their lifeless victims.
Describing his recent coyote encounter, Mr. Robinson told the Bangor Daily News, “I’ll never forget looking up and seeing a jaw full of teeth coming at me.”
I’m pretty sure that at least one of Mr. Robinson’s would-be murder victims — a bear, deer, moose, or other species — has thought, “I’ll never forget looking up and seeing a lead-filled phallus pointed at me.”
But I’m equally certain that the creatures whom Mr. Robinson and his savage friends and clients have hunted would not have absolved their killers by saying, “They were doing what hunters do” — rather, they would have lamented that unfortunate reality.