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Inexplicably, No One Captures Video of Piranha Attack in Argentina

Photo by Brian Gratwicke

Photo by Brian Gratwicke

Would someone please tell me how 70 people swimming in a river on Christmas Day can be bitten by piranhas without a single onlooker capturing the attacks on video? What kind of voyeuristic society lets an incident like this unfold without documenting the carnage? For the love of grapefruit, people, video of the audacious fish tearing flesh from the bodies of defenseless swimmers would have provided a long-lasting fix for my schadenfreude jones.

For those of you who don’t receive Google alerts about piranha attacks, and for those who don’t have thoughtful friends who let you know about successful animal-on-human attacks, the news out of Rosario, Argentina, is pretty exciting.

The Daily Mail (London) has reported that “the attack, blamed on a piranha species called palometas, was the most serious of its kind in the city since 2008 when 40 swimmers were hurt. … The piranha are said to have been attracted by debris left by fishermen.”

It’s a shame that the fish didn’t feast on the fishermen, but I’ll take what I can get.

What pisses me off, given the number of victims, is the lack of video documentation.

Am I to believe that not one goddamned person on the riverbank thought to film the incident?

In this Daily Mail news video, a woman is seen talking on a cell phone while wading in the river where the attacks happened. So, I’ll accept no technology-related excuses.

That no one said to himself or herself, “It looks like palometas are savaging the natives. I’d better film this,” represents a terrible and unacceptable failure.

For god’s sake, numerous people captured video of a meteor breaking apart over western Siberia in February.

It’s really not that difficult, people.

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