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Prairie Dog Hunt Organizer Feigns Concern About Threats

Photo by Claire Dobert/U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service

Photo by Claire Dobert/U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service

If one is sponsoring a killing contest, I don’t want to hear him whine in the face of due criticism. Case in point: Mark Chavez, whose Los Lunas, New Mexico, gun shop, Gunhawk Firearms, is sponsoring a competitive prairie-dog hunt, told the Albuquerque-based CBS affiliate KRQE that critics have “talked about our families and blowing the store up.” What follows is an open letter to Mr. Chavez.

Mr. Chavez, you spineless punk,

When’s the last time you heard a terrorist bitching about being unpopular with his enemies? Well, that’s exactly what you’re doing, and I can smell your bilious nonsense from here. What did you think the reaction would be when you announced your latest competitive wildlife slaughter?

The blood on your hands from last year’s coyote-murdering contest hasn’t washed off, has it? And that’s just fine with you, isn’t it? Thirty-nine coyotes paid for a shitload of publicity.

How many prairie dogs will die this week so you can sell a few more guns? It doesn’t matter to you, does it? The numbers are only important to the worthless asshole who murders the most animals. It’s not the killing contest itself that generates publicity, it’s the outrage of those who despise you and your callous ilk.

Admit it, you chickenshit motherfucker: You’re reveling in being the knuckle-dragging villain with the target on his back, because you’re pretty damn confident that no one’s going to make good on any of the threats about which you’re feigning concern. And that would be a safe bet, because as enraged as the more evolved among us are, we don’t get off on killing.

The threats you claim to have received are unfiltered expressions of frustration from those who feel powerless to stop the bloodletting. And that lack of control stings even more when people realize that control is what you’re peddling.

You know who’s enticed by the promise of control? Terrorists.

Instead of bullshitting everyone, why don’t you just grow a pair and admit that the best way to sell killing tools is to offer your bloodlust-full clients a chance to compete for a cheap sense of control (and a new lead-filled phallus) while you borrow from the usual, tired propaganda to stir up a bunch of publicity-rich controversy?

It’s because you’re a soulless coward. And I don’t expect that to change anytime soon. Still, you ought to stop embarrassing yourself by whining about those who wish you harm because you profit from those who savagely inflict the same. It doesn’t make you a savvy businessman. It makes you a detestable scumbag.

Wishing you all the very worst,
David

14 Comments

  1. Utchka wrote:

    Beautifully said! Bravo! Killing for recreation is obscene.

    Friday, August 9, 2013 at 8:33 pm | Permalink
  2. David Brensilver wrote:

    Utchka,

    I appreciate your kind words — and your sentiment.

    David

    Monday, August 12, 2013 at 11:39 am | Permalink
  3. RIcky wrote:

    Interesting satire. I especially like the extreme over-use of the foul language. It makes it truly seem more like someone completely without common sense or the ability to reason wrote the article. Great job!

    Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 7:27 pm | Permalink
  4. Riley wrote:

    Don’t you have anything better to do than cry about prairie dogs? Does anyone actually read this silly blog?

    Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 7:52 pm | Permalink
  5. Spaniard wrote:

    Wow you really are an idiot. You have got to be the largest sack of retarded shit I’ve ever seen. I truly hope you get to see your own dog ripped to shreds by coyotes after they use a decoy female to lure it out of your yard. It amazes me how stupid and ignorant people like you are when it come to population control of unchecked wild animals. There was some other asshole up in Sandia heights that was tampering with game and fish bear traps just this week. I hope a hungry bear eats that asshole too before it attacks a small child or kills someone’s pets ( except yours dick, I hope it gets your) a mountain lion was killed last month at an elementary school in Roswell, you ever think how bad that would be?! If the police didn’t get involved? Your new green peace bull shit really irks real hunters and groups that get together and put events like these together to benefit communities where pests are a real problem. I bet you pansy bitch made ass uses pesticides and poisons too. You make me sick with your hypocrisy because as higher thinking mammal you still would kill an insect with no hesitation as the ants come marching in, but you cast judgement on all of us. Do humanity a favor and go rinse your mouth out with buck shot. As evolution goes you’re the slowest in the herd

    Signed
    Bamf

    Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 8:08 pm | Permalink
  6. Tom wrote:

    Spoken like the true, clueless bleeding heart anti-hunter you are. Too bad you haven’t a clue to how much hunters are the best providers for wildlife in America today.

    Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 8:19 pm | Permalink
  7. Harry wrote:

    Pop goes the prairie dog! Thousands of them are shot every year in an effort to control them, but because we don’t use poison to kill them, we are evil murderers. Get Real

    Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 8:32 pm | Permalink
  8. retired military wrote:

    You seem to care more for rodents than your fellow man. The only terrorist is you making veiled threats that are supposed to make a person feel threatens. While I spent my life defending the right for you to spew your hateful speech. It makes me sad that you can not see what you are and how you got those freedoms. You obtained these freedoms by people who carry guns. They hunted, they shot rodents and wolves to keep them away from their livestock. They also used those same weapons in war against people who would suppress your freedoms. So be for you go and “hate ” people and use “hate” speech remember what your forefathers did and be grateful instead of whining over a few rodents. By the way where was your outrage when this last session your representatives voted to kill defenseless pigs anyway they can, by traps, gun, poison, etc..

    Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 9:23 pm | Permalink
  9. animals r. yummy wrote:

    I wish you had the cojones to really do something David. Did you notice that prairie dogs are a nuisance and so are coyotes…isnt it funny how you say that we use weapons to kill animals yet you bring up terrorists and they are ok to kill…and they are also considered a nuisance also. You are a pathetic excuse for a man, I do not trample on your rights to run your cum filled mouth so why do you think it is ok to trample on mine. I have found through the years that most people who talk a big game over the internet and swear and demean the other person, as you have, are nothing more than too ignorant to have an intelligent conversation and never confront anyone in real life, but run to the computer to try and find the 1 out of 100 people who support your idiotic ideas. Your sincerely, Gun Toting Vet.

    Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 10:23 pm | Permalink
  10. animals r. yummy wrote:

    P.S. I HOPE THEY KILL A FEW THOUSAND PRAIRIE DOGS THIS YEAR.

    Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 10:24 pm | Permalink
  11. Joe wrote:

    Here’s something all you knuckle-dragging neanderthals don’t understand: You’re wrong.

    NM Land Commissioner Ray Powell, a man with far more knowledge of, and education in wildlife and habitat conservation than you will ever have, decries killing contests regardless of species. The man in charge with maintaining New Mexico’s public lands understands that you blood-thirsty savages don’t know what the hell you’re doing. Killing contests devastate wildlife and the environment. Dr. Powell is right – all you idiots are wrong.

    Admit it – you sick, violent perverts get off on killing small, helpless animals because it makes you feel like men. Nothing else in your life makes you feel like a man, so you have to show how you’re bigger, stronger, and less intelligent than a 3-lb rodent.

    You hunters are worthless and pathetic. You want to talk about habitat degradation? How many kids do you have? Geez – it couldn’t be *you* who is responsible for habitat degradation, could it? You want to talk about the environment? How many MPG does that huge truck of yours get? And believe me – that huge truck is another way you compensate for not being a man.

    The best you morons can do is repeat the same BS that you’ve heard over and over again. “Hunters are stewards of the environment!” “Hunters pay for wildlife!” “Hunters know how to use toilet paper!”

    Kill yourselves – you’re all useless and worthless.

    Thursday, August 15, 2013 at 11:52 am | Permalink
  12. ray wrote:

    The only good rodent is a dead one. Way to go . Wish I had the time to join in.

    Friday, August 16, 2013 at 5:17 pm | Permalink
  13. Robert wrote:

    Joe- Why are all hunters useless and worthless? Please, enlighten me

    Monday, August 19, 2013 at 5:48 pm | Permalink
  14. Ms. Dysnomia wrote:

    I love when people who kill things in brutal ways get offended or surprised when people get upset about it. Keep up the good work, David.

    Tuesday, October 8, 2013 at 3:03 am | Permalink

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