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Tag Archives: hunting accident

Hunter Population Numbers One Fewer

Once in a while, in addition to giving us reason to celebrate, news of a fatal hunting incident can provide a decent grammar lesson. First, the news. According to the Associated Press, an inebriated dimwit in Florida, while taking a break from killing fish, checked to see if his handgun was loaded by putting the thing to his largely empty noggin and […]

How Can Hunter Live With Himself After Shooting, Killing Brother?

I was working on a novella called Baptism by Piranha when the red phone rang. It was my good friend Monty Gelstein, calling to update me on his search for a way to partially light the darkness. “There was a fatal hunting accident in northeastern Utah over the weekend, and all I can think about are the bastards who live to […]

Raise Money to Protect Animals, Let Wounded Hunters Die

Nothing would fill me with rage more than being stuck at an intersection where a bunch of mouth-breathing troglodytes were raising money to help the “victim” of a hunting accident. A few weeks ago, in Etowah County, Alabama, the community set out to do just that, in an effort to help pay a worthless thug’s medical bills. On […]

Shark Fishing Tournament Organizer Dies in Hunting Accident

Imagine my delight upon reading the headline “Monster shark tourney organizer dead in duck hunting accident” in last Tuesday’s edition of The Martha’s Vineyard Times. The story was sent to me by a loyal reader whom we’ll call “Liz.” The Martha’s Vineyard Times report explains that “Steven James, president of the Boston Big Game Fishing […]

On God and Hunting Accidents: Thoughts on Interpretation

I recently became aware of an entrepreneurial faith-salesman who got involved in the fairy-tale business after divine intervention purportedly helped him survive a terrible hunting accident. As reported by a shameless propaganda tool called The Christian Post, “Don Jacobson almost died in a hunting accident, but God saved and transformed his life through a series […]

Rabbit Hunter Dies in “Hare-Trigger Incident”

“I’m hopped-up after reading this wonderful Sky News story about one rabbit hunter fatally shooting another.” I posted that comment on Facebook last month and am thrilled to report today that the deceased actually shot himself. According to a report in the Daily Mail (London), the “rabbit hunter died after being shot in the head […]

Hunting Accidents Prove Hunters are “Remarkably Stupid”

“Does this dress make me look like a moose?” That’s the question 68-year-old Newfoundlander Joan Primer should have asked before attending a family get-together in November 2011. To be fair, Primer had no reason to believe that she’d be “shot in the shoulder while enjoying a ‘boil-up’ with her family,” to quote from a June […]