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Tag Archives: hunting

While We Can Decide Not to Watch “Duck Dynasty,” Animals Have No Say About Being Hunted

After hearing bits and pieces about Phil Robertson being suspended from A&E’s reality series Duck Dynasty, I decided to bring myself up to speed on the story. As I understand it, there’s a TV program on the above-mentioned network about a family of thuggish rednecks whose business is supplying duck hunters with tools of the […]

Sarah Palin to Host Hunting Show — Here’s Hoping She Gets Fatally Mauled

“Do I hope Sarah Palin gets fatally mauled by one of her would-be murder victims? You betcha.” That was my public response yesterday when I read that Palin would be hosting a television program on the Sportsman Channel. According to a press release issued by the Sportsman Channel, Palin will host a program called Amazing […]

Hunters Say Controversial Study Linking Hunting to Cretinism is Bogus

A controversial new study linking hunting to cretinism has at least one hunting-industry lobbying group up in arms. In a paper published on Wednesday, Marcus Aurelius Armitage, director of research at the Center for Fewer Humans, wrote: “While not every human afflicted with cretinism is a hunter, we can say with near-absolute certainty that every […]

U.S. Sportsmen’s Alliance Apoplectic Over Anti-Hunting Promotion

The mouth-breathing knuckle-draggers at the U.S. Sportsmen’s Alliance are apoplectic over the fact that an anti-hunting organization delivered its message to nearly 18,000 basketball fans at the Minnesota Timberwolves’ Oct. 30 game against the Orlando Magic. U.S. Sportsmen’s Alliance Foundation President and CEO Nick Pinizzotto was quoted in a Nov. 1 public word-tantrum as saying, […]

Where Hunting Passes for Culture, Or, More Reason to Despise the French Drooling Class

The way French stormtroopers dealt with bullfight protestors in Rodilhan, France, this past weekend was reminiscent of the way the Ohio National Guard dealt with anti-war demonstrators at Kent State University in 1970. While no protestors were killed by thuggish police in Rodilhan, the aggressors’ attitudes, in both incidents, were the same. Whether with words […]

On the Paradoxical Claim that Trapping is “Under Attack”

The following letter was sent to Doug Jeanneret, the U.S. Sportsmen’s Alliance’s vice president of marketing. Dear Doug, you arrogant bastard, I’ve been meaning to take you to task for your ill-conceived piece of propaganda, “Our Oldest Outdoor Tradition,” in which you cited Benjamin Franklin’s famous rallying cry, “We must, indeed, all hang together, or […]

Dick Cheney a Loser at Antelope Hunt Contest

Reports of Dick Cheney’s hunting rifle malfunctioning have afforded many reasonable people the opportunity to deliver the stand-alone punch line: “If only it was his pacemaker that failed to function.” According to The Huffington Post, “a gun malfunction kept former Vice President Dick Cheney’s team from having a chance at the One Shot Antelope Hunt […]

Hunting Porn: Depictions of Cheap Power and its Heartbreaking Cost

Photographs of hunters posing with their “trophies” never fail to sicken and enrage me. I’d planned, this morning, to write about a 16-year-old Spaniard who was recently killed during a “running with the bulls”-style event not far from Madrid. Before I began, I checked my e-mail and had a quick look around the Internet, to […]

Connecticut Hunter Gets Jail Time After Thuggish Son Shoots Beagles

A worthless goon in Connecticut is serving a paltry prison sentence for his teenage son’s thuggish behavior. The Journal Inquirer reported last month that an “Enfield man who admitted complicity in his 13-year-old son’s shooting and killing of three beagles after they interfered with his hunting of deer in Suffield last fall was sentenced … […]

Don’t Be Another Royal Savage: Open Letter to Prince George

Dear Prince Caligula — sorry, man. I’ve just been told your name is George. So, let me try this again. Dear Prince George, If you’re reading this, you’re probably old enough to understand the influence you have over the rabble — especially because you’ll one day rule over them without shame. Before you ascend to […]